Alistair Begg is the pastor of Parkside Church outside of Cleveland. His preaching ministry is familiar to many through the Truth for Life radio program. Pastor Begg recently became the subject of controversy when he discussed his counsel to a grandmother whose grandson was marrying a transgendered person. The grandmother wanted to know if she should attend the wedding. Begg related that he asked if her grandson knew she did not affirm his lifestyle and marriage. When she answered that he did, Pastor Begg said, “I suggest that you do go to the ceremony. And I suggest that you buy them a gift.” (You can find the full interview here: https://www.truthforlife.org/resources/sermon/christian-manifesto-interview and a follow up response to his congregation here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t2bmFuA40T4)

Begg received a lot of backlash from Christians for his advice to her. American Family Radio removed Truth for Life from its lineup and others called for Begg to repent. In response, Pastor Begg said that he has no need to repent of his words.

Marriage is a major battleground today. Many Christians continue to proclaim the Biblical teaching that marriage is the permanent union of one man with one woman. Opposition to this teaching has been intense at times. Many in Christianity have found reason to soften or deny the Bible’s teachings about marriage.

Pastor Begg is theologically conservative with a long history of affirming the truths of the Bible, including a Biblical view of marriage. He has proclaimed without apology that homosexuality is a sin and that marriage is reserved for a man and a woman. In his response to the grandmother he made clear that the marriage in question is contrary to Scripture.

The issue Begg was addressing was not the legitimacy of homosexual marriage but the advisability of a grandparent attending what many conservative Christians would consider a gay wedding. Her question is entirely different from the permissibility or morality of homosexual marriage. Begg’s response does not indicate a difference of belief about marriage. His response suggests a difference of belief about the role of congregants at a wedding and a difference of belief about how best to show love to others.

The words “marriage” and “wedding” are not synonyms. Marriage is a union of people in a legally and socially approved bond. A wedding is a ceremony where the marriage union is joined. Marriage has a lifelong union as its ideal outcome. Sitting through a wedding may feel interminable, but, ideally, it is not a lifelong event.

Many believe attendees at a wedding are playing an active role in the ceremony as witnesses who give their support to the couple and affirm the legitimacy of the union. This belief has a long history. This view of attendee as participant is seen in the familiar ministerial injunction, “If anyone can show just cause why these two may not lawfully be joined in holy matrimony, let him speak now or forever hold his peace.” For those who hold this belief, attending a gay wedding gives unspoken approval of the marriage.

On the other hand, many see attendance at a wedding as nothing more than observation. The person attending may be expressing their affection for the participants, but attendance plays no active role in the joining of the couple in matrimony. For those who hold this belief, attending a wedding does not necessarily offer an opinion on the propriety of the marriage.

The Bible is clear about the nature of marriage, but says nothing about the responsibilities or role of those attending a wedding. Legitimate applications to weddings can be drawn from the Biblical teachings on marriage. Those applications must be recognized as responses to the Biblical truth, but not the Biblical truth itself.

The Bible does not speak about the congregant’s role in a wedding. Therefore, attendance at gay wedding must be treated as a matter of conscience. Sound, Biblical reasons can be offered for attending, or refusing to attend, a gay wedding. Each believer must carefully, prayerfully and Biblically consider his own response to this issue. Each believer must permit other Christians the liberty to do the same. Christians should not reject or malign someone like Pastor Begg, who has a long history of faithful Biblical teaching, because they disagree with the counsel he gave on a subject not addressed in the Bible.